Chosun Bimbo

This is the rugby report for the weekend of the 24th September.

Imagine my surprise flicking through the TV channels on Saturday afternoon, to find live rugby being played in Korea!!!? It was (from what I could make out) the annual match between Yonsei University and Korea University. Kind of like the annual Kings, Grammar game I guess - though you’d think that apart from size the Kings or Grammar 1st XV wouldn’t have to much of a problem dispatching either team on a good day!

It was not the best game to watch - I left it half way through the second half - but interesting nevertheless to see some Korean rugby. Korea University had a good First Five making 4 fom 4 attempts and the Korea forward pack were strong in the scrum but far to slow getting to rucks and mauls. In contrast the Yonsie wings had a good time of it but their Fullback who was doing the kicking was particularly crap. What made the game so boring was that it rarely went past second phase play wih both teams usually stuffing up in the ruck and there were forward passes and knock ons every two minutes. When I changed the channel Korea University was up 14-11 over Yonsei.

In other news: In two years I have learned that there really isn’t anything worth bitching about in this world. That is except for genuine inconvenience. I have been without Gas since Sunday. I didn’t realize how much life relies on gas. No hot showers since Sunday. No hot water means no shaving - shaggy mess that I am. No gas - no cooking, and inparticular no boiling water - no boiling water means NO COFFEE. Now again in the big scheme of things no big deal. I’m used to ‘Korea Time’ - things usually take a day or two to go through the motions. But you know something is up when ‘The Boss’ comes to you and exclaims he has no idea what’s up with the gas! So I might have a hot shower (and a shave) sometime Thursday.

Primary school classes will start for me in a couple of weeks time - I spent Tuesday designing and making name tags for all the staff with a nice photo and stuff on it. ‘The Boss’ has me slated for some reading classes which should be good. The school is about 10 minutes out of town (Yonmudae) - And they are all good little shy country school Kids. He also said he was a bit worried about the new teacher Conan whose name I can’t but help cracking up at every time I hear - "Conan the Barbarian!" hahahahahaha

buchim
(Traditional Korean Pancakes)
Stuff you need:
Flour
Salt to taste
Oil
Water
Baking powder
Green leafy things
Red leafy thing
Method:
Drain 4 KGBs
Cut up green things and cook
Mix flour, salt, and baking soda with water
Add green things
Mix
In a shallow pan cook like pancakes…

Viola!

In other news…The new Teacher’s name (well English name) is Conan. (like the Barbarian, or late night talk show host). And he is here to replace Kelly - not give me free periods! Kelly is leaving for greener pastures. Or something.
‘The Boss’ received an email from his daughter in Ohio who is feeling a little homesick - and he is thinking of sending some Kimchi by mail to her. Now that sounds stupid until you remind yourself of the two jars of Marmite you got in the mail yourself a couple of weeks ago! So anyway I sent her an email with a few homesickness tips that I have found usefull in the last year and a half.
Speaking of ‘The Boss’ I got nailed for a W140,000 bill for the old apartment! (NZD$160.00) I couldn’t believe it! W60K for cleaning and another W70K for replacing things! EXCUSE ME? They replaced the toilet seat for god’s sake!!! Why?! well apparently thats what happens in Korea - bleach and some disisnfectant just won’t do it I guess. The plug hole things that stop cutlery falling down the drain - have to be replaced. And apparently I got charged for thirty or so light bulbs or something.
Of more interest, and I am a little skeptical already, we teachers will be spending 40 minutes each week at the local elementary school.

This weekend is Chusok - or Korean Thanksgiving. One of the times of the year when you can see everyday Korean folk go about their everyday business dressed in Traditional Hanbok.

And what a weekend it has been! After confirming my evening appointment for Monday with Sophia I met Ken and James for BBQ and a few drinks. Ken also invited me to Suwon for the weekend. Which after several attempts to make it up there I greatfully accepted. Saturday afternoon we took off to Suwon  in James’ car through the horrible pissing rain in the Chonan region and into Suwon.

During Chusok one goes home to one’s parents and one’s hometown. As the majority of Korea lives within Seoul and Suwon (and Kyonggi) it meant the place was virtually a ghost town by the time we arrived.

There was however time to kill before dinner so Ken initiated me to the whole Korean Sauna thing. Saunas appear to be big business here in Korea - some are quite oppulant - Roman bath style if you will. My big beef (being a cloistered New Zealand foreign type) is walking around totally naked from shower to hot bath to cold bath to steam room and back with everything on show. Nevertheless the hot pools and heat rooms made me feel reinvigorated for the night ahead.

Look at the size of that TV!!!!

Saturday evening and I had the pleasure of meeting Ken’s family: his wife and daughter Lucy and son Andy and we had BBQ for dinner. Ken is particularly worried about his daughter’s English ability, which for the two hours a week of lessons she gets at school isn’t too bad. And having a father who speaks good English does her wonders. I guess Ken, and his wife, are like every other parent in Korea fretting over their child’s education!

Saturday night was a thoroughly entertaining night of drunken debauchary of which my recollection is (surprisingly) intact - actually it is no surprise at all - but least said the better. Ken put me up in a nearby hotel of which I am particularly greatful and I was off to bed at the reasonable hour of 1am.

Sunday was interesting. Ken took me along with his family to the Korean folk village just east of Suwon. I guess the comparison is with MOTAT in Auckland but it is no where near as disappointing (or falling apart for that matter.)  Indeed it is very interesting. I have a reasonable understanding of Korea’s modern history, but  have little knowledge of Korea prior to 1900.

And here for your viewing pleasure is a picture of  me in a silly hat:

Then we went to Suwon Castle where there is wonderful views of the city though on Sunday it was a little Hazzy. (Much like what I was feeling) I arrived back in Nonsan by Moogungwha class train - somewhat slower and not nearly as nice as I am used to but does the trick.

Sunday evening Sophia picked me up and we spent a fun couple of hours. In the spirit of Chusok I gave her some Kiwi fruit (3 and a half kilos worth) all the way from New Zealand (via Woori Home Mart). And I got some wholesome traditional Korean food. Yummy! We walked along the resevoir and back and had a (terribly tasting) coffee at the Lake Hills hotel. Stay tuned to this developing story - certainly Ken and James thought it hilarious and are waiting for the gossip next time we meet which apparently won’t be for a couple of weeks as Ken is off to Thailand and then Shanghai.

In other news:
It was with huge suprise and some trepidation that a gentleman entered my classroom during first period today and introduced himself as the new teacher…I’m sorry? Does this mean I will once again get some free periods during the week? I really hope so, but I won’t count my chickens.

Short week ahead (YAY!)

Bought a DVD copy of ‘Full Metal Jacket’ while in Suwon

It is a great feeling to own something that has been reviewed on Engadget (other than large brand name items like PSP and iPod Minis.)

PS apologies - some of these pics might take time to load on dial up connections

Korea isn’t a particulaly flat country. Indeed something like 60% of the land area is mountain. As a result every stretch of flat land that isn’t occupied by dwellings (ie monstourous apartment blocks) is utilised for agriculture. At this time of year you cant help but notice huge expanses of green rice paddy - starting to turn a sort of greeny-gold colour as the rice becomes ready for harvest. Travelling back from Seoul last weekend the long tracts of flat green fields looked amazing as I sped through the countryside at 300km/h. Contrasting this, the area closer to Nonsan is particularly undulating - very few flat bits, after all ‘~san’ means mountain, and you see more stereotypical terraced paddies like those postcards from Thailand.
Best TV this week: Will you Marry my Dad (Season 2). Basically it’s like the Bachelor/Bachelorette except three daughters get to eliminate 12 over 30’s and try and hitch her up with their dad. Meanwhile the old man is sitting back in the hot tub with the biatches sinking cold ones. - Thinking value 0/10 - entertainment value a sturdy 8.5/10
Worst TV this week: (Again) The SImple Life (Season 3) Paris dumb ass Hilton and Lionel Richies mutant bastard love child pissing about. Thinking value 0/10. Piss Take value 10/10
In other news I have worn a tie to work two days in a row despite the continuing heat. A heat made worse this evening by the fact it rained and is now so humid it’s not funny. (Much to my disappointment no one has said anything.) I did however mark the roll book incorrectly yesterday meaning Sophia called some parents accusing the kids of skipping school when in actual fact they were in attaendence. Ooops.
Yet again Korea comes up with the goods - Another long weekend - This month celebrating Chusok or Korean Thanksgiving. I was planning to spend the entire three days sitting on the couch in my pajamas watching TV and playing Playstation. However I have been invited to thanksgiving dinner on Monday at Sophia’s House. Lots of traditional Korean fare to be had.

Here are some pics of the new apartment (although they lack any sort of context.)
And finally: Oi! Go vote!

Apparently there have been some complaints that the foreign teacher doesn’t look professional enough.

EXCUSE ME?

Now I would be the first to amit I had no style - but I certainly don’t come to work in a ripped Metallica shirt without my hair clean and combed. (although occassionally I forget to shave.)
I wear a collared shirt to work everyday. Now admittidly I came to work on Friday in a pair of Cargo Pants, but they were clean and pressed, no rips or holes - clearly acceptable in terms of mufti regulations - but apparently still ot good enough.
Stay tuned for my planned reaction.

It was poined out to me that my last two posts have a striking similarity to each other. This is a worry as I thought I only ever repeat myself when I’m drunk. I was surprised too to find that it was someone other than the usual suspects who pointed it out to me. Of course as someone once said you should never mess with the mothers: Don’t mess with Mother Nature, don’t mess with your Mother in Law and don’t mess with the Mother fucking Ukranians.
In other news: I failed to point out that Ken and I finished the English voice over work for his company and he made a nice little DVD with the two presentations I added my voice to. Unfortunately due to Copywrite I can’t post them, but will make a copy available to anyone interested. They will need to send a cheque or money order for $9.99 and a self addressed envelope to the address below…
So one of the things I have got the kids in class to recently is write a diary in English. They are by in large unexceptional except for Kyle - in one of my more advanced classes. I also teach his younger sister. With many thanks to Kyle his recent entry is reproduced below:

Friday 2 Sept. 2005. Sunny
"Go To Your Room and Study"
My mom’s nagging is endless.
‘Clean up the mess!’, ‘Put the book back in the bookcase’, ‘Put your empty bowl in the sink!’, ‘Turn off the light’, ‘Turn off the water’, ‘Let it go!’ ‘Because you are the older brother!’
But it was not my fault to be the older brother, My mum and dad made a mistake. And if she gets mad she always says ‘Go to your room and study!’
Mom stop it please! I can do everything by myself now.

Kids crack me up.
And now for something completely different: Well actually I guess its in a similar vein in that it deals with English usage - and I must say Kyle’s is nowhere as bad as some of the inane "Konglish" (or is that Engrean?) I have seen. At the top of the list this:
"Feel it, Enjoy it and fall in love with it"
And then maybe get married, have a daugher buy a house, get divorced and pay child support…This is on a box of Crackers!!!!! At least it’s gramatically correct.
And then there are ‘Technology spirit’, Icecream and City’.
One of my personal favourites has to be:
"See you at the Acapia
Now this needs a bit of explanation. the Suffix ‘~pia’ comes from ‘Utopia’. As a result you see ‘~pia’ tacked on to numerous words and phrases to emphasise the greatness or supposed utopian aspects of something. You can see "Icepia" a cold drinks fridge, "Phonepia" and so on.
I gather the phrase above is related to some sort of academpic utopia. Where do I see this sign? On the stairs everyday as I go into work. This mindless piece of Konglish mocks me everyday as I go and (try to) teach real english.

In yet more other news I was told I should apologise for the ‘homesick mamma’s boy shite’ at the end of may last post. (qudos to LS). So I will apologise on the condition that a) Someone cook me eggs benedict with ham on a poppy seed bagel on Saturday morning (LS?) or b) someone can point me toward some sort of eaterie here in Nonsan that does a passable western breakfast. Until then - No Dice!!!….

Anyway how could you not like Korea when there is at least one long weekend every month. (ie next weekend.)

And finally I have this to say

‘I ate his liver with some farver beans and a nice Ciante’

And so by Monday morning everything was neatly unpacked and in it’s place in the new apartment. All is well - the place needs a mop - but I am happy. My initial reservations were unfounded. While smaller the apartment is much nicer (no wall paper peeling off the walls) and more modern (instant hot water a major plus). It works out to be a 10 minute (brisk)walk to work from the new place so I am kidding myself that I am getting a bit of exercuse each day. Perhaps now if I took the stairs instead of the elevator and stopped eating so much I might get somewhere?! (I thought I miht get the new eye toy game for Playstation 2 that is like a work out with a physical trainer - that way it would be fun and I wouldn’t have to embaress my self (more than usual) at the gym. - We’ll see.

I have successfully cast my vote for New Zealand First despite the tempting proposition of voting for the NEW Zealand family rights protection party or the Republic of New Zealand Party (Why do they even bother?). The electorate was a bit harder to decide. I am a Manukau East voter by virtue of the 2 month stay with the Grandparents prior to my departure - and frankly the mix of independants, United Future and Maori Party candidates didn’t really do it for me - so the vote went to incumbant Labour MP Ross Robertson.

Let me preface my next comments by saying I feel for anyone who has been caught with their pants down by the shear force of mother nature. BUT as I was saying to Ken on Friday - whats up with people in New Orleans going fucking mental on it and looting and shooting at the cops and stuff! When the bottom of the North Island floods - as it is want to do from time to time - you don’t see people going nuts! Moreover how patronising in tone is CNN America? I am so happy that we get Hong Kong based CNN International here in Korea. Are people really that dumb in the US that they must be spoon fed there news and talked down to to such an extent?

Imagine my suprise when this morning (lunch time?) I flicked to channel 58 and found New Zealand comedy ‘The Strip’ playing with Korean subtitles. 30 minutes of homesickness later and i was off to work - wasn’t too bad - had it been set in Auckland I would have been a mess/ I dunno? There’s something in the air at the moment - but I wouldn’t mind a few days in Auckland - maybe a coffee at Atlas and Eggs Benedict at Cezan…

The Bimbo has changed premisis! Thats right - on Wednesday ‘The Boss’ matter of factly told me I had 2 days to pack up all my shit cos I was amovin’!

In anticipation of his new school being built by this time he apparently took a new lease on the place right opposite the school - which is of course still a vacant piece of land.  No big issue then just put everything in boxes and the moving men will arrive Saturday with their cherry picker type truck contraption (we all live in apartment blocks here) and I’ll just direct the action being overlooked by ‘The Boss’

No such luck. Cheap ass mutha f@#$er I had to lift the fridge, the bed, the washing machine and every thing fucking else first down two flights of stairs and then up 3. Now in the usual circumstances this would not be so bad - it comes with moving. BUT by Fiday I had packed almost nothing, the old apartment was a bombsite and I went out with Ken and James and got very very drunk.

So I came home in the very early hours of Saturday morning and managed to pack everything and clean everything and have enough time to sit down and have a coffee before the heavy lifting began.

All in all the whole process took only 3 hours It was just that I was knackered by the time we had finished.

The new apartment is well appointed, more modern than Buyoung but smaller by 2 rooms. (thats right I have only one living space, bath and bedroom) and there is no bath. But the paper isn’t pealing off the walls and it will be warmer in winter. It does mean I am a ten minute walk from work (as opposed to 2 minutes) but it’s right opposite the super market and the vacant block of land where the new Jung Chul should be.

So this morning I woke up feeling like shit hardly breathing coughing up crap - so I have a cold - my body aches increadibly - but I put that down to the lifting - Don’t think I have bird flu just yet.

Oh and I can’t download my voting papers - I new this would be too good to be true - totally inadequate election commission - shame on you.