Chosun Bimbo

Eggs

It was poined out to me that my last two posts have a striking similarity to each other. This is a worry as I thought I only ever repeat myself when I’m drunk. I was surprised too to find that it was someone other than the usual suspects who pointed it out to me. Of course as someone once said you should never mess with the mothers: Don’t mess with Mother Nature, don’t mess with your Mother in Law and don’t mess with the Mother fucking Ukranians.
In other news: I failed to point out that Ken and I finished the English voice over work for his company and he made a nice little DVD with the two presentations I added my voice to. Unfortunately due to Copywrite I can’t post them, but will make a copy available to anyone interested. They will need to send a cheque or money order for $9.99 and a self addressed envelope to the address below…
So one of the things I have got the kids in class to recently is write a diary in English. They are by in large unexceptional except for Kyle - in one of my more advanced classes. I also teach his younger sister. With many thanks to Kyle his recent entry is reproduced below:

Friday 2 Sept. 2005. Sunny
"Go To Your Room and Study"
My mom’s nagging is endless.
‘Clean up the mess!’, ‘Put the book back in the bookcase’, ‘Put your empty bowl in the sink!’, ‘Turn off the light’, ‘Turn off the water’, ‘Let it go!’ ‘Because you are the older brother!’
But it was not my fault to be the older brother, My mum and dad made a mistake. And if she gets mad she always says ‘Go to your room and study!’
Mom stop it please! I can do everything by myself now.

Kids crack me up.
And now for something completely different: Well actually I guess its in a similar vein in that it deals with English usage - and I must say Kyle’s is nowhere as bad as some of the inane "Konglish" (or is that Engrean?) I have seen. At the top of the list this:
"Feel it, Enjoy it and fall in love with it"
And then maybe get married, have a daugher buy a house, get divorced and pay child support…This is on a box of Crackers!!!!! At least it’s gramatically correct.
And then there are ‘Technology spirit’, Icecream and City’.
One of my personal favourites has to be:
"See you at the Acapia
Now this needs a bit of explanation. the Suffix ‘~pia’ comes from ‘Utopia’. As a result you see ‘~pia’ tacked on to numerous words and phrases to emphasise the greatness or supposed utopian aspects of something. You can see "Icepia" a cold drinks fridge, "Phonepia" and so on.
I gather the phrase above is related to some sort of academpic utopia. Where do I see this sign? On the stairs everyday as I go into work. This mindless piece of Konglish mocks me everyday as I go and (try to) teach real english.

In yet more other news I was told I should apologise for the ‘homesick mamma’s boy shite’ at the end of may last post. (qudos to LS). So I will apologise on the condition that a) Someone cook me eggs benedict with ham on a poppy seed bagel on Saturday morning (LS?) or b) someone can point me toward some sort of eaterie here in Nonsan that does a passable western breakfast. Until then - No Dice!!!….

Anyway how could you not like Korea when there is at least one long weekend every month. (ie next weekend.)

And finally I have this to say

‘I ate his liver with some farver beans and a nice Ciante’

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